Update

Hey guys! Sorry I haven't posted much lately. Just wanted to give you an update though. Everyone knows the Holidays are hectic and it was indeed the same for me. I ended up hurting my back where I could barely move walk for about two weeks. It was a horrible pain that I never want to experience again. Want to know how I hurt it? Of course you do! I sneezed. Yeah, that is all I did. Ha, I knew I was officially old at that point. 
I also celebrated my 30th birthday! (Like I just said, I am old!) A few friends and I went to dinner and then went out for some drinks and dancing afterwards. It was a lot of fun and here are a few pics from that night! 

My friend that moved away came back for a weekend for her last company Christmas party and I got to go as her date. It was Masquerade themed and I love myself a themed party so I was very excited to go. We partied like it was our high school's 11th year reunion and acted 21 again. We had so much fun, like usual. 

My mom ended up in the hospital a week or so before Christmas. After numerous tests, she was diagnosed with Shingles. I never realized how common it is. She is out of the hospital now but is still in a lot of pain. 
I am sick, again! It seems to be going in a circle with this bipolar weather we are all having. Last week it was 74 degrees and right now it is 33 degrees. Don't get me wrong, I love cold weather but I hate the big jumps in temperatures that keeps getting everyone sick. 
Anyway, that is all for now. Hope all is well with all of my Don't Judge Me readers. Happy New Year!

I'm Thankful

This year has been very rough on me and my family but I still have a lot to be thankful for. My mom was diagnosed with congestive heart failure and even though she is living on oxygen and has a lot of  other health issues she is dealing with, I still have her around to talk to everyday and I am thankful for that. 
My dad was diagnosed with stage 3 colon cancer and that is one of the hardest things I have been through in my life. He went through hell but he beat cancer and I am thankful for that.
Since I was my parents main caregiver and financial support system, I lost my car and that was embarrassing and painful. Cars are replaceable though. I still have an older car that is paid off that is still running and I am thankful for that.
We can't afford to buy Christmas presents this year and I know that really hurts my parents because this is the first year they won't be able to. I explained to them that we are all adults now and we understand that it isn't possible. We are thankful that we have each other to spend the Holidays with, even if it may be in the hospital.
I know I haven't technically lost her, but I feel like I have lost my best friend. The person that was always there for me the past 7 years when my other friends weren't or couldn't be, moved away. I know she is still there for me but it still makes me sad knowing I can't see her whenever I want to. She is still one of my best friends and I am glad she is still there for me, even if it isn't in person, and I am thankful for that.
I have two other friends that I was close to over the years off and on and we have rekindled our friendship this year and it has definitely helped me through these past few months. If they weren't there for me, I don't know how I would have got through it. I am glad I have the few friends I have and I am thankful for them.
My sister and boyfriend have helped me mentally through this year.  My sister with making me laugh and just being there for me in person. My boyfriend for calming me down when I always need someone to talk to. They both mean the world to me and I am thankful for them. 
Even though you have a crappy year and you don't think you can make it, there will always be someone there to help you through it. Even though there are days I feel like I am alone and I become bitter towards everyone and everything, at the end of the day, I am thankful for my friends, family, and life itself. I have had a lot put on me this year and it is normal to have little mental breakdowns here and there. It is the way I deal with a stress overload. Just because I am thankful for all of these things, doesn't mean I won't struggle here and there to accept why all this had to happen. I think too much and try to understand everything and I will never have an answer to my questions but this is my own battle and I will be okay. I wrote this post to hopefully help cope with this year and to try to move on. It brings me down too often and I don't like it one bit but this is a process and things will get better. 

Things that make me happy

     Even the smallest, cheesiest things can make me happy. Stephanie from Three loud kids pointed out that I need to smile more, well at least in pictures. It's true, I do need to. For many reasons, I'm not in the "smiley" mood. Lots of stuff is going on right now and it is hard to deal with at times. I will try my best to smile more and here are 10 things that make me happy:

1. Chocolate milk. If you want an instant smile on my face, give me chocolate milk. Always works.
2. Hugs and kisses from my snookems make me happy. I feel like everything is OK when I am with him.
3. My parents dog, Nala always puts a smile on my face. She is always there for me, as weird as that may sound.

4. I am happy that I am finally in the delivery area of Jimmy John's. Yum!

5. My parents and sister make me happy. Always.

6. I love taking naps. 

7. Swimming! I wish I had an indoor pool so I could swim year round, whenever I wanted.

8. Milwaukee. I love going back home to Milwaukee to visit my cousins. I'm just happy the whole time when I'm there. 

9. Being with my good friends. I love being goofy and not caring what others thing.

10. Smiling makes me happy. If I am smiling, that means everything is OK  I'm in a good mood and have no worries, for the moment.