NN2uex2hLTE-6AzWK4OLi2XPdEc Don't judge me: Crappy new year

Sunday, February 3, 2013

Crappy new year

     I have always looked forward to celebrating the new year for many different reasons, for which most of them don't make a whole lot of sense but this year is definitely a year I don't want to celebrate at all. I wish I could go back in time and just pause it for a while and enjoy life without stress, without worry, without having to deal with reality and maybe the news I received in this crappy new year wouldn't be seem real.

      My Dad, who is my best friend, my hero, and a big part of my support system was diagnosed with stage 3 colon cancer. I'm not sure I will ever understand but why him? He is the healthy, strong parent. He is kind, funny, and the strongest person I know, so why he deserves this, well he doesn't! I know life isn't fair, believe me, of all people, I know this saying too well! What I don't understand is how much of this, "Life isn't fair" bull crap I can handle! I'm not sure how much more I can handle being thrown at me.

     I'm probably going to have a lot of these type of posts where I don't understand what I have to go through posts but this is how I deal with it, or at least try to deal with it. I have family and friends who are there for me, but for some reason, I don't know how to get my feelings out. People want to hang out and get my mind off of it and I am grateful, I really am, but in reality, this is the only thing I am thinking about right now.

     All I can do right now is be there for him, be strong, be positive, and be extremely thankful for all of the prayers we are receiving. My Dad is loved by many and he WILL get through this, so I can too!


2 comments:

  1. If it helps you to write your feelings out then keep up the writing. I can't begin to say I know what you are going through or how you feel. I want to just say that you and your family are very strong. I have seen you beat and accomplish many things. You will look back on this and say, "We beat that too." Stay strong.

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